A Fierce Flourishing: Part II, Life in the Spirit

Back on October 29, I said that "tomorrow" I would share the second half of the talk I shared with our local MOPS group.  Today is that tomorrow!  You can read Part I here, in which I lay out the Gospel.  I reread it and felt renewed excitement about how much God has done for us through Christ - a perfect topic for reflection in the Christmas season.  I encourage you to start there, then come back to read this post.

Welcome back!  Isn't it amazing how much we receive freely from the Lord when we take Him at his Word and place our trust in Christ.  Today I want to expand on point number three: "We are filled with the Holy Spirit.  God empowers us to live for Him!"

The passage du jour for the talk was Galatians 2:13-25

13 For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 14 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” 15 But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. 

16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. 24 And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 

25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.

In the opening verses of this section, Paul reminds us of Christian freedom; we are free from sin and have unrestricted access to God.  Then he points out the new purpose we are given when we become a Christian: serve one another humbly in love.  This echos Jesus' words in John 13:34, A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

Side note: "Loving one another" includes the people we live with!  I am convinced that we can grow more spiritually under our own roofs than anywhere else.  At home our character is truly tested.  In fact, I never knew what a horrible person I could be until I got married, then had kids!  For fun, reread verse 15.  Don't some days at home feel like "biting and devouring"days!  Please tell me you know what I mean ... now, back to the post.

Life in Christ gives us new purpose, to love one another.  And it also introduces a battle.  The theme Fierce Flourishing captures this so well.  When we believe in Jesus a serious war begins within us, the old self (flesh) vs. the Spirit, our new identity in Christ.  The list in verses 19-21 manifests itself even under our own roofs and in our actions and reactions as moms, or whatever our occupation!  (This is why Jesus died on the cross, by the way.)

But the situation is not one of hopeless struggle till we get to heaven.  No, the new Spirit in us means we can become Fiercely Flourishing Christians, and moms.  The Spirit is the difference maker, the game changer, the hope giver!  If you are a Christian the Spirit of God LIVES IN YOU.  (Let that sink in a minute.)  So Paul gives three instructions for living by the Spirit and not being defeated in the new battle that is introduced into your life when you come to faith:

1. WALK by the Spirit
2. BE LED by the Spirit
3. KEEP IN STEP WITH the Spirit

What do all these mean?  Generally speaking, they all imply activity, intentional movement away from the flesh toward God and others.  We must be learning the Spirit's way so we can walk in it: read the Bible, pray, hear the Word preached, attend Bible study.  We must be listening for the Spirit's direction to be led by Him.  And we must be quick to get back into step with the Spirit when we're out of step.  In short, a fierce flourishing does not come without engagement!  The Spirit will give us direction, strength, and wisdom to become fiercely flourishing people; engaging with Him is how we grow!

Do you long to to be the kind of person described in Galatians 5:22-23: loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled?  That is only possible as God works in us through His Spirit; we engage in the transformation process by walking, being led by, and keeping in step with Him.  The goal is not perfection, only in Christ are we made perfect.  No, friends, the goal is faithful engagement, one day at a time, with the Spirit of God who lives in us and can transform us, enabling us to flourish fiercely!

Here's a quick summary of the two parts of this talk, before I send you on your way:

• Jesus is the only way we can have a right relationship with God and live eternally with Him - our biggest problem is solved!
• A right relationship with God is the way our hearts and lives can be transformed into something new and good.
• God puts His Spirit in us to help us in the battle that will wage in us against the flesh till we get to heaven.
• We can only experience a fierce flourishing in the Christian life by engagement with the Spirit, starting right where we are, the goal being faithfulness, not perfection.

May this Christmas season be a new beginning for you!  May the Lord fill you with awe at His free gift of love to you in His Son, gratitude for the Spirit He has put in you to transform you, and hope that the fierce flourishing you're longing for can be found by engaging with Him.

Peace.

A Fierce Flourishing: Part I, The Good News

Yesterday I had the opportunity to share a message with our local Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) group.  When my friend, Sharon, invited me to speak, I quickly chose Galatians 5:13-25 about the fruit of the Spirit and wanted to share with the women about becoming "fruit-filled moms."  A few weeks ago I checked in on their webpage to learn a little more about the group before starting to prepare.  There I learned that the theme for the year is A Fierce Flourishing.  What a great image, right?  I loved how simply reading that phrase made me want to rise to the occasion of mothering my children, to fight for goodness in our home, and to see God make us thrive!

Because God is good and guides, the Galatians passage fit so well with their theme.  In this post I will give you the condensed version of what I shared with the ladies yesterday.  In short, we can only experience a fierce flourishing with God.  It begins by putting our faith in Christ - i.e. becoming a Christian - and continues by living life by the Spirit.  Never, at any moment, can we go it alone!

The ladies and I started our time together talking about how being a mom was different than we expected, in both positive and startling ways.  We enjoyed some laughs and agreed together about the joys and challenges.  Then we made up a little list of what a "good mom" is, acknowleding that none of us are living up to that standard that we're always trying to attain.  What I wanted to encourage the women with at this point was that God can transform us into that kind of mom: loving, attentive, patient, making wise choices for her children, etc.  We are all so painfully aware of our inadequacies, but God can enable us to experience a fierce flourishing as we walk with Him!  It starts with believing the good news.

So before I could get to reading or talking about life in the Spirit from Galatians 5, we had to talk Good News.  I laid out the story of how God created things to be, how sin entered the world, how Scripture tells us our biggest problem is spiritual, and how God, because He loves us, made the way back to right relationship with Him through the death and resurrection of Christ.  (I know you've heard me talk about this now and then here on the blog!)  Of course, for the Good News to make any difference in our lives, we have to respond to the message by faith: admitting we are a sinner in need of saving (repenting) and believing Jesus is the Savior and Lord.  After sharing that, I wanted to be clear with them what happens when we put our faith in Christ - several incredible things!

1. Our sin is removed as far as the east is from the west.  Guilt and shame and forgiven, we can approach God freely with confidence, not fear.
2. Christ gives us His righteousness.  God looks at us and sees His perfection.
3. We are filled with the Holy Spirit. God empowers us to live for Him!
4. We have the promise of eternal life with God.  All things will be made new.

That's so much more than a ticket out of hell, isn't it?  Such Good News!  Good News of new life!

As I had been preparing for the talk, reading through Galatians 5:13-25, it hit me that becoming a "good mom" is a spiritual issue.  We can try out cool ideas and establish good routines as mom, and those are helpful.  But they are secondary to our need for a change or heart, a transformation of character that only God can bring about inside us.

You'll have to wait till tomorrow for the rest of the message, however, because I think this blost has gotten long enough!  And I need to go get ready for the day.  Since I am stopping here, may I ask you a question?  Have you put your faith in Christ?  Have you been reconciled to God your Creator?  The Bible says:

If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. As Scripture says, “Anyone who believes in him will never be put to shame.”  Romans 10:9-11

Repent and believe the Good News!

Coming Up: Speaking at a Conference & a Giveaway!

Friends!  I have exciting news to share with you.  I will be joining a group of speakers at a conference for moms in Illinois on November 7!  Just outside St. Louis, MO in Collinsville, IL, you can join us for a day of fellowship, good teaching, heart-filling encouragement, and tasty food, all with other moms who are longing to be refreshed and revitalized as much as you are. 

All of the speakers have attended intensives with Sally Clarkson and have personally benefited from her counsel, wisdom, teaching, and friendship over many years.  But more than that, these women walk with the Lord and have story after story of how HE has transformed them through motherhood and used motherhood to grow their faith.  I am so excited to hear what each one has to share; these women are my sisters, people who I admire and from whom I have learned so much in just one or two weekends of my life.

Topics to be covered

• Spiritual Mothering
• Encouraging One Another
• How do I fill my cup?
• Equipping Moms to Disciple Their Children
• Mom's With Swords: In Defense of the Value and Beauty of Motherhood
• How can I be a Mentor to others, when I don't feel equipped?

I have the privilege of sharing about how we can encourage one another, a topic that is dear to my heart.  We can all use encouragement, at any moment of any day, right?!  I look forward to challenging women to embrace their ability to become an encourager, in response to what God has done in their lives.  Our focus text will be Hebrews 10:19-25.

In my post on Wednesday, I shared the difference Sally Clarkson's book, Mission of Motherhood, has made in my life and how it is helping me to pursue this calling in faith, rather than continuing on an endless search for "the right formula."  That is not her only book that God has used in my life, not to mention getting to attend the intensives!  This day-conference is supposed to be like attending one of those intensives; it is a day to be poured into and equipped, so you are ready to give and keep on giving to your family and other moms.

Please consider registering (that means pray about it, ladies!) for the conference here and bringing a friend along!  Or if you are not able, please share this with any mom friends you may have in the St. Louis area and Illinois.  Thanks!

Hey, It's a Giveaway!!

In the spirit of the excitement building around this event and what I shared in my post on Wednesday, I would like to give away Sally's book, Mission of Motherhood!  One of the women in our group this fall said, "Thanks for picking such an encouraging book.  I kind of want to give every mom a copy."  I could not agree more.  So even if you already have a copy, maybe you could win this one for a friend.

Here's how to get your name in the running!  You get one entry for each of these things, so let me know in a comment how many times to throw your name in the hat.

• Leave an "I'm in" comment.
• 'Like' my Facebook page for the first time.
• Share this post on Facebook, Twitter, or with a friend, if you don't do the social media thing.
• Register for the conference!

Look at that!  You could have your name in the running up to four times.  Don't forget to mention in your comment how many times I should put in your name.  I can't wait to see who wins!

***Winner will be announce Thursday, October, 22.  Entries due by midnight EST, October 21!***

Open for 2015 {Week 36}

Every Tuesday evening around seven women start arriving in our home.  They grab a cup of tea or water from the dining room and then make themselves comfortable in the living room.  Out of their bags they pull their Bibles, notebooks, pens, and their copy of Sally Clarkson's Mission of Motherood, this fall's discussion book.

It has been several years since my first read through the book.  I remember how it changed my life as a mom.  Sally's biblical encouragement opened my eyes to mothering by following Jesus' example, looking at the way he taught, guided, admonished, and did life with his disciples.  At the time, all I knew was that I wanted to get my preschooler to obey me, but she didn't always want to!  Then I would get mad, my default when I'm not getting my way.  It was a sorry cycle.  Mission of Motherhood gave me new ideas and new hope.

Reading through the book again this fall - with a couple more children added to the mix and all older than Elizabeth was when I first read it - I am disappointed I have read it over and over throughout the last several years!  The principles of mothering by faith, not formula, are timeless.  The work has gotten both more fun - because older kids are lots of fun - but also more challenging, as there are more decisions to be made, more focused character training is necessary, and their questions are getting tougher!

Honestly, I am not up to the task.  I am well aware of my own flaws, (I still default to anger when I am not getting my way), and of my flimsy strength to keep on in the good fight of the faith.  Rereading Sally's book as my oldest is on the cusp of puberty and my youngest is busy being three has given new wind to limp my sails.  There's hope!  We're all gonna make it because God is faithful and because He can transform me, and my kids.

May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.  1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

This blog post is way behind, but being OPEN to transformation was the theme that was emerging mid-September.  Doesn't is sometimes seem like giving up or being mediocre is really the best option?  The phrase "I just can't adult today" has become a funny refrain in our lives and on our Facebook feeds.  I find it hilarious!  But I think it is indicative of how hopeless and ill-equipped we often feel to handle what is before us.  God promises over and over in His Word that He can transform us, from the inside out!  And that He will give us hope for each day.


So, to the weary mother who feels like she's failing, God says, I gave you these little ones, because you are the mother I had in mind for them.  Trust me; love them; don't fear; keep giving; I love you!  I will not abandon you and I will provide for all your needs, from forgiveness of your sins to food on the table.  I can change your life and your family's life!  Press on in faith.

When I first read Mission of Motherhood, I watched God do amazing things in our family as He gently pointed out areas in my life in need of change.  I began to enjoy my relationship with Elizabeth, rather than thinking of her as a job, a drain on my time, or a project.  I had the privilege of being her mom!

I wonder what God will do this time around,

if I OPEN up my heart to the transformation He has for me?

Time to Take Action:
I tell you these things to lift up your hearts and encourage you.  Dear one, you might feel stuck, but you are not!  The change you are looking for, however, will not come with a better plan or more self-discipline.  You need to be transformed by the Living God.  Thankfully, that's His business!  First, He cleanses us of all our sin through faith in Christ, then spends the rest of our lives molding us into His likeness by the power of His Spirit in us!  This is not just for moms, but for all people who would believe.

Will you take Him at His word and let Him transform you?

Here are some verses for reflection:

Ezekiel 36:24-28For I will take you out of the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into your own land. I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. Then you will live in the land I gave your ancestors; you will be my people, and I will be your God.

Romans 12:1-2Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

2 Corinthians 3:16-18But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

photo credit

Open for 2015 {Week 33}

Last week was what I'll call a Pushback Week.  For several days almost everything I asked the kids to do was met with opposition.  Something was not right and I was not sure I had the stamina - or kindness in my heart - to outlast it.  I'm typing here today, so you know I did, but in the midst of it I was not confident!

Knowing that I was reaching my breaking point, (meaning I wanted to scream and yell a lot, give my children life-long consequences, and tell them they could never come out of their rooms, ever), it occurred to me that perhaps it was time to consider being OPEN.  I could not change my kids' hearts,  but what did God want to happen in me?  How could I use these trying days to take a deep breath and trust the Lord to use them to increase the fruit of His Spirit in me?

I wish I could say that, after those holy thoughts, I kept my cool every moment and gently guided each one child his or her moments of frustration, willful disobedience, and anger.  I cannot.  But I can say, Praise be to God who uses being a parent to remind me how He loves me when I am ungrateful and discontent, unlovable and disagreeable.

• Being OPEN when I am getting pushback from my children means remembering my own scarlet sin, and that my Savior has washed me white as snow.

• Being OPEN also means trusting in the Lord and loving Him so much that I press on in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, despite my strong desire to throttle the little blessings He's given me!

Like I said, it was not a stellar week for me either; I am weak and a work in progress, just like my children.  But when one is interrupted by grace in the middle of a Pushback Week, the best she can be is thankful.  Who is this God we serve who is so slow to anger and abounding in love?  Our Redeemer--the LORD Almighty is his name-- is the Holy One of Israel.

Have a good weekend with Him!
Heather

PS Most of the time, I think my kids are the coolest creatures in the world.

Here we are pretending we're on a wild magic carpet ride!

The Most Difficult Thing About Being a Mom

Guys!  Or should I say, ladies!  I have a revelation to share with you.  I have discerned what the hardest thing about being a mom is!

Of course, there are a lot of challenging aspects of being a mom: training up the children, dealing with their misbehavior, keeping the home running, functioning on less sleep, etc.  But none of those things really tops the list.  Those are all dwarfed by the greatest challenge facing mothers today, and mothers of every part of history past and future.

Are you ready for it?

The most difficult thing about being a mom is ME.  Yep.  Or in your case, the most difficult thing about being a mom is YOU.

What do I mean?  Well, as I march along in the mom years, having celebrated my oldest's eleventh birthday last month, I'm learning that the job never gets easier.  (You can laugh, I really did believe that at some point being a mom wouldn't be so hard once the kids were self-sufficient.)  There is no longer an infant in our home with the physical demands that brings for one's body, so I am "free" from that phase.  But guess what.  Where the little ones drain you physically, the older ones stretch you emotionally, relationally, and spiritually.  The job just keeps coming at ya, with side shows of laundry, cooking, and cleaning!

What exactly makes me the problem, then?

I am selfish.  Really selfish!

At least once an hour each day I mutter exasperatedly, I don't have time for this, or, I don't want to deal with this right now!  Why don't I?  Because I want peace in my home for my own comfort, not for the sake of my children, the sake of the Kingdom, or to bring God glory.  I love the fun times with my family when all is well, but I pitch a fit so quickly when I have to deal with an interruption, another sibling fight, spilled milk, or an urgent task I forgot about but remember when I'm about to sit down and rest.

I moan and groan.  I complain and whine.  Sometimes Often out loud!

But it is not the job; it is not the task; it is not the children.  It is ME!

The attitude of my heart needs to be changed.

How about you?  Do you feel this each day, the battle that is raging between your self-love and the call to love God and others?  Friends, we will never be free from the war this side of heaven, but we can make advances to push back the enemy, until we can enjoy the true rest of heaven!

Coming to this embarrassing realization has been helpful, because God has used it  to remind me of a few things:

1. We are not helpless before our selfishness.  The Spirit lives in us and will help us remember Jesus's teaching and example.  In each moment we have a choice; He will help us to choose light rather than darkness!
2. We are 100% forgiven.  Jesus came into the word to save sinners.  That is each of us!  He knows what we are capable of, but called us into His Kingdom to be His own and to be changed.  Our failures don't define us, and neither do our successes.  Our identity is children of God, heirs in His Kingdom.  We know ourselves, and should always be floored by that good news!  Praise the Lord!
3. We can be transformed.  "God as the great transformer" is a phrase and theme that has been coming up over and over in my life since last fall.  We all want to "be better people," but God has something far greater in mind.  He wants to work in our lives with supernatural power to transform us, to make us new, and use us to advance His Kingdom and purposes in the world.  Rejoice, there is hope for selfish mothers everywhere!  God can change our hearts and attitudes and, in turn, our homes!!

While I hate to admit that I am the problem and that I have to let go of blaming other people and circumstances for my bad attitudes, I believe that is the very beginning of being set free and the first step toward change.

Mamas, you are loved and God sees you working day in and day out to care for the physical and emotional needs of your family.  He is cheering you on, He is sustaining you, and He is there to help you in every moment!

It is always good to look to Christ, so I will close with that.  Last night in our Own Your Life* book and Bible study group, we read Philippians 2.  I was struck by looking at Jesus:

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,
    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
rather, he made himself nothing
    by taking the very nature of a servant,
    being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
    he humbled himself
    by becoming obedient to death—
        even death on a cross!

God gives us authority in our homes and over our children.  Let's push back the dark by using our position not to our own advantage, but to serve, like our Lord.

May God bless your day.

~Heather

*Pick up this book asap!  It has been such a help and encouragement to all of us.  Own Your Life by Sally Clarkson

You Love Them, but Do You Like Them?

A couple of weeks ago, I borrowed a book on CD from our church library, A Woman After God's Own Heart, by Elizabeth George.  I had listened to most of the first disc over a couple laundry folding and ironing sessions at home, but yesterday had the chance to listen to a large chunk of the book driving to and from Pittsburgh.  The topics covered included marriage, motherhood, and time management.  I felt very spurred on to love and good deeds by Mrs. George's words of wisdom and Biblical guidance!  I was also struck by how much of her message was similar to other female Bible teachers I know who have dug deeply into the Scriptures to seek out the what and the how of following God as a woman.  It is good to find consistency!

The last school day of each month, we field trip!

Mrs. George shared about how much their home changed when she and her husband became a Christians.  Life was lived more intentionally; they really wanted to obey and honor God.  As a mother, she knew she had to discipline and guide her children, but quickly became a dictator.  She knew something was missing.  She found out what as she studied her Bible even more: affection.  The Word of God taught her not only to teach her children obedience, it also set her free to like and enjoy them!

As she shared this, I was reminded of my own transition from seeing my kids as little beings to manage and teach obedience to seeing them as people to like, enjoy, and cherish.  Sally Clarkson's words were my start down that path; God used her counsel through her books to change my heart.

Mrs. George explained that as she was reading Titus 2, seeking out what young women should be learning and doing, she came across the line, Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children. As she's fond of doing (you learn from her book) she got her husband's study books and looked up what love meant in that passage.  It is not the unconditional love we know God has for us and that we know we are to have for our kids.  Rather it is a word for affectionate love!

Friends, you love your kids, but do you like them?  As Sally might ask, have you studied them, gotten to know their likes and dislikes, their gifts and talents, their hopes and fears?  Do you think of your children only as a huge drain on your time, energy, and finances?  Or does your heart swell with affection for them when they come to mind?

I know, I know, our kids are not always likable.  Neither are we!  I also know that practicing liking one's children transforms the home.  Our job as moms is not simply to manage and discipline our kids.  Another part of our calling is to love them, affectionately.

My encouragement to you today is to give liking your kids a go!  Sit down with them and talk, play a game together, take a walk, go for ice cream, and just enjoy the little or big one(s) God has placed in your care.  I know rearing kids is not easy; it is hard work as a sinner to help to tame a younger sinner and teach them to walk in God's ways.  I am familiar with the weariness.  But I have also found that liking my kids and enjoying their company makes the hard parts more tolerable and makes me want to help them more, because my affection for them won't let me desire any less.

Press on, parents.  God is with you!

Interrupted by Grace 2015: From Drain to Delight

I'm blogged daily in April. and it ends today!  Learn more about the series here

This is it, friends!  April comes to a close and so does another interrupted by grace series.  My prayer this morning is that my offering of words has pointed you to the Grace-full Interrupter, our God who loves us, rescues us, and works in our lives for His glory.  I don't want to miss Him because I am too busy, to distracted, or too self-absorbed.  I don't want you to miss Him either!  May God continue to prick us by His Spirit with reminders to love Him and love one another deeply from the heart.

Yesterday was the day I planned to put Sally's advice into practice by spending some unstructured, unscheduled time in nature with the kids.  The weather forecast earlier in the week indicated that Wednesday would be perfect for it and our calendar was blank, a match made in heaven!  With a little planning ahead, I had some special snacks for the trail in case we got hungry.  We were ready for our souls to be filled.

After wrapping up the three R's and a little science and history, we laced up our shoes, filled up the water bottles, buckled our seat belts, and headed for a local state park.  Online I had learned about a trail that sounded perfect for our group: short, flat, and near a stream.  I'm so grateful to the fellow who had taken the time to write about his experience there; the trail was perfect for us!

 We stopped at a bench to eat our snacks and I was overwhelmed by the pleasure of being there, with my kids.  I was interrupted by grace when I thought, I love my job!  Then I said it out loud for them to hear, so they would know I am thankful I get to spend my days with them.

Friends, what you need to know is that I haven't always and I don't always love my work.  When my kids talk, they seem to all want to talk at once!  When it's time to do any kind of work, at least one child complains!  When we put them to bed, they don't always stay there!  When I think about how daily I have to keep on repeating the same tasks, chores, and responsibilities, I don't always (or ever) squeal with delight!  But sitting there yesterday, having my soul filled by views God's beautiful woodsy creation, warmed by the bright sunshine, and touched by my kids' contentment, it hit me how much He has done in my heart over my mommy years to move me from thinking of caring for my children as a drain to a delight!

Later on our stroll we stopped at a small "beach" and the kids spent quite a while being themselves with the sand, rocks, and water: skipping stones, making small dam, throwing rocks into the water, creating paint from colored stones, digging holes, etc.  We talked, laughed, and enjoyed.  WE ENJOYED!

It is not always easy to enjoy, is it?  We get snared by the to-do lists, the responsibilities, the difficulties and challenges, the exhaustion, and the burdens.   How quickly we can forget that God calls us to rest and to fill up our souls on Him and what He has created for our pleasure!  I tell ya, that excursion energized me for the cooking, laundry, and other work I had to do the rest of the day.

If you are feeling depleted, take a few minutes today to think about what recharges you and what areas of life you need God to show up and transform your attitude.  Then make a plan to do one soul-filling thing before the week is out.  Also be on your toes looking for times that God is interrupting you by grace.  April may be over, but not God's work in our lives!

GIVEAWAY WINNER!

I suppose now you'd like to know who won the coffee and chocolate, don't you?

You're the winner!

I will be in touch about getting your treats to you.

Yay!

Interrupted by Grace 2015: Forgiveness in the Family

I'm blogging daily in April. Learn more about the series here.

Look, they still all fit on my lap!

Yesterday was a classic grace interruption because it had everything to do with receiving grace, giving grace, and letting grace have the final say.  The kids had begun their school work and everything was going fine.  Sometimes they complain, but as far as school goes, they are usually pretty agreeable about doing whatever needs to be done.  Yesterday, however, one encountered a bump in the road and had to think a little about some math problems.  By the end of the page, I knew the child needed to burn off a little steam so I suggested we do ten jumping jacks together to shake off the frustration.  On a common day, that is a perfect idea, a little silly and different.  Not yesterday!

At this suggestion I got, "No, I'm not going to do that."  They sat stubbornly in their seat and would not get up to join me.  It turned from a fun suggestion into one of those times when the kid is being defiant and disrespectful, so they have  to do what I am asking for reasons of obedience.  Ugh.  In the end, said child was sent to to their room.

After a few minutes, I went upstairs.  Now, for those of you who know me well, I've confided in you that I get angry easily, especially in scenarios with my children like the above.  (I am much more patient with other people's children!)  Through these several minutes of parent-child combat, the Lord was helping me to keep my cool.  In the past I would have stomped my way upstairs to help the child understand the situation by yelling and commanding.  This time, I was feeling calm and collected, because I knew the yelling wouldn't help and I'm trying to learn maturity!

I calmly enter the room.  As is this one's custom when they're feeling emotional, they were hiding out under the bed.  Ugh.  "Please come out from under the bed."  "No."

After a couple of kind pleas, I gave up.  I don't remember what I said. I didn't yell, but I definitely slammed the door HARD on my way out.  So much for keeping my cool, and maturity, and all that.  Sigh.

Returning to the kitchen to work with my other student, I decided I would just wait for their sibling to come down on their own.  As I waited I was thinking about how to respond when they did.  The Lord was interrupting me by grace, impressing upon me the need to not do what I wanted, which was make the child understand all of the wrong and then kinda speak to them rudely for the next little while because they deserved that.  Rather, the Spirit was prompting me to let grace reign.  I needed forgiveness for slamming that door just as much as my child did for being disrespectful and defiant.

It was not long before they came back downstairs and sat down at the table.

I welcomed them back with a hug, taking the opportunity to interrupt their day with a little grace!

The jumping jacks were still undone, and under weak protest were completed.  Language Arts took a little longer than usual to get going, but for the most part that tense scene was over and done with and did not taint the rest of the day as it would have if I had been un-interrupted by grace and stuck to my usual pig-headed ways.

At some point mid-Language Arts I apologized for my immature, angry door slamming.  The child never officially said sorry and I didn't demand it, but their change in behavior expressed it.  And, to tell you the truth, yesterday was a really great day!

Grace.  What a life-changer!

For as high as the heavens are above the earth,

so great is his love for those who fear him;

as far as the east is from the west,

so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Psalm 103:11-12

Open for 2015 {Week 3}

How are you today?  I think it would be so fun to sit down with you, dear reader, and catch up with you if I know you well already or get to know you if we are not well acquainted.  When I write I imagine I am talking these words, conversing with whomever will read.  I am thankful for words and messages to share with one another and the way God uses people in our lives to build us up with spoken or written truth.

This week I noticed the OPEN sign on the wall in my kitchen many times.  There she hangs to remind me to remain OPEN to the Lord and to whatever life brings.  I had planned many weeks in advance to have ladies over this past Saturday to start a book discussion of Own Your Life, by Sally Clarkson.  I was so excited to begin our journey through the book together.  After scheduling that on the evening of a day our oldest already had a swim meet, my sister-in-law invited us to my nephew's birthday party.  It would be held in the window between the swim meet and our book club kick-off and they live forty-five minutes away.  Of course, right?

We step out in faith and inevitably encounter some challenges!

In my stubbornly determined way, I refused to make any changes, we could just charge through the day and make it all happen.  Then, Thursday of last week, my husband, through circumstances beyond his control, learned he would not be available for our busy January 24.

Deep breath.

Then the questions:  Should I have his parents come and baby sit during the meet?  Should we skip the party in the middle?  Should I cancel our ladies gathering?

No.  The answer was no on all fronts.  We could have a great day together.  We would be tired by the end, but each event was a wonderful thing and the house would stay as orderly as it was because we wouldn't be home all day!  Perfect!!

The main reason I knew we should plow through was because I knew the Lord would give me strength and be gracious to us.  He called on me to start a book group and He would be faithful.  I was holding Him to it!

And He was.

• The younger two were great at the swim meet, in fact the littlest was unusually calm and delightful in the unstructured environment, only melting down a little toward the end because she was tired.  And the middlest found other waiting-around siblings to play with, in addition to having some electronic entertainment, and the hours flew by.  I was amazed, and thankful.
• Getting to hang out with extended family at the birthday party was delightful.  I am always glad to see those people who are part of who I am and who I love so much.
• And finally, to hear many women at our evening gathering share about how long they have been wanting to be part of a ladies Bible study!  Well, I was deeply humbled and blessed by God being with those women.

So, OPEN in the face of circumstances beyond our control.  I usually complain about these things or try to finagle my way out of them.  Really, I do; I am a whiny wimp.  But Sally's book and God's Word  remind me that I have a choice about how I respond to my circumstances ... and I might actually get to see God do some things if stop thinking about myself all the time!

Time to take action:  Are  you in the midst of circumstances beyond your control that make you want to, say, kick, scream, cry, complain, curse, etc.?  Maybe you have a day coming up that you are dreading or are in the middle of an on-going trial.  How can you OPEN up to God?

• Ask the Lord to help you to taste and see that He is good right where you are.
• Confess to Him your sinful tendencies to fear, doubt, complain, or try to escape.
• Rejoice that God will be your stronghold and helper in the midst OF EVERYTHING.  He is always near.  In fact, try to spend more time rejoicing than you do asking and confessing!

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:4-7

Do you have any testimony of God working in your life in the midst of trying circumstances?  I would love to hear your stories!  If only we could meet over a cup of coffee this morning.  I guess the comment section will have to do.

Till Thursday, walk in His way!

Open for 2015 {Week 2}

Funny how quickly days can get away from a person!  Tuesday is almost gone, but I will get this post out in cyber-world before I crash for the night.

As you probably know, I have a theme word this year and one way to keep my mind on it is to write weekly about how it is impacting my day-to-day life. I'm extremely unfocused and can be excited about something one moment and be incapable of telling what I was excited about in the next moment.  Okay, well, maybe I'm not that unfocused, but you get the idea.  Thanks for the accountability this year.

The "word of the year" is OPEN.

This past week I think the definition of OPEN that I was trying hardest to practice was available to follow or make use of, not taken up with duties or engagements, because things like this

won't last forever.  And, more importantly, I want to learn to be like my Savior.

One of my greatest challenges as  mom is enjoying and engaging with my children when there is SO MUCH TO DO!  As the day goes by and my to-do desires remain unfulfilled, my inner-tension can mount.  Then I get impatient, then I miss the little moments, then I don't love as I should, as I truly want to.

So last week, as I thought about OPEN, I tried to say yes more often, make space for the little people in my life, and do the to-dos when I had moments for them.

Guess what?  Nothing, absolutely nothing traumatic or horrific happened because my kitchen table was cluttered most of the week and I didn't get that really-in-the-way box of things to Good Will.  Remarkable!  Even better, however, I have a lot of really wonderful memories from last week:  I went to the beach with Katherine and helped her put on countless dress up outfits; Elizabeth, Brian, and I played the games they got for Christmas several times; I invited them to help me get some rooms picked up, and the helped with minimal weeping and gnashing of teeth; and my heart was so full of joy in many moments at who the three of them are.

Cheesy beaver teeth!

Being closed can become a habit, but last week I was reminded that being OPEN can become a habit too.  I still gaze at my precious to-do list with longing, but those three definitely out-do that list for winning my heart.

Time to take action:  Maybe you can relate to these thoughts.  You may neither have children nor be task oriented, but perhaps there is some way that you're inclined to stay closed rather than "opening up" to what being OPEN could offer.  This week, ask the Lord to show you how you can be  available to follow or make use of, not taken up with duties or engagements, i.e. OPEN.

Till Thursday, walk in His way!

Interrupted by Grace {Day 16}: Irritability

Man, yesterday morning I was feeling the rub of all things that needed to be accomplished before the sun set.  When this happens I get really antsy and impatient, mostly with the kids.  My irritability in such situations makes it difficult for me to speak kindly to them, every word comes out with a sharp edge and every sentence ends with a sigh.

The reality, there was nothing wrong.  The worst that could have happened - and did - was that Elizabeth had to complete her work during her rest time and I would have to stay up a little later than I wanted.  Horrific, right?

Once school work was done and the kids watched their usual post-rest time cartoon, Katherine was awake and we headed to the grocery store.  The to-do list was slowly diminishing; I had been able to blog alongside Elizabeth while she worked and write a grocery list while they kids watched tv.  No disasters had occurred!  Remarkable, considering how my morning attitude indicated that the world was going to end or something!

In the middle of all my heart "hecticness", I sensed the Spirit several times telling me to chill out, take a deep breath, and speak kindly.  I was interrupted by grace that God was reminding me of His presence and His desire to mold me, even in the midst of my sin.

What a gracious God that while we were still sinners He died for us.  What a compassionate God that He doesn't spit spiteful speech out at us like daggers (like some mothers I know!), but gently nudges us in our hearts by His Spirit.

I'm floored by His mercy and loving-kindness.

I want to look more like Him.

It is a great week to meditate on such things!

Interrupted by Grace {Day 15}: Parenting

I'm getting softer as a parent as we march along this journey with our kids.  For the most part, this is really good; I was not the most compassionate and kind mother when it was just Elizabeth.  Lately, however, I've found myself not wanting to bother with many training and discipline moments, because I feel maxed trying to keep up with the basics of family and home management. Some of my attitude is a reaction to having a highly active and assertive toddler in our home. And some of my response is old fashioned selfishness, I can't deal with a tantrum or whining right now, so I won't invite them in.

I don't know about you, but I am always wondering if I'm getting anything "right" as a parent.  I believe this comes from being a parent in an environment that gives the impression that we have to figure everything out, have a plan and system for every eventuality, and if you don't, your children are doomed.  Maybe that's just my interpretation, but I imagine some of you know what I'm talking about. I feel the pressure from both secular and Christian influences and can tie myself up in knots trying to sift through all the information and expert opinions. In the process, I completely miss out on enjoying family life.

How does this all relate to yesterday?

The house was a mess.  Tons of out-of-place toys, books, games, shoes, and clothes needed to be returned to their proper homes.  Often I find it easier to deal with the picking up myself, because it's faster and I don't have to listen to anyone potentially complain about helping.  I knew I needed to get the kids in on the action yesterday evening, however, for their good and mine.  Katherine was watching Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood; the window of opportunity was open.

I asked the kids to help.

They did!  Without complaining!

Elizabeth tackled the living room and wanted to do it on her own.  Brian helped me prepare pizza dough, then assisted me in picking up and vacuuming the kitchen while the dough rose.

I was interrupted by grace at how God helped me to get over myself and get my kids in on helping.  And I was interrupted by grace that they did with such vigor and enthusiasm, which I believe was God's way of assuring me that everything's gonna be okay.

Interrupted by Grace {Day 7}: Talking About Growing Up

This weekend was a coming-together of thoughts and a release from fear that I owe to God, of course, but that He worked mostly through a friend's bold blog post called, Let's Talk About Sex.

We have an almost 10-year-old young lady in our home who lives in her own little innocent and beautiful world.  She doesn't ask many questions.  Lately, I've been feeling like I need to talk with her about being female and life changes that are coming up.  But I've also felt so petrified about how to get the conversation going when she's not inquiring!  In addition, I've been immensely confused about what she needs to know right now and what could be saved for a future date.

I read Ruthie's post on Saturday and felt inspired to get talking with Elizabeth from a Godly perspective.  So I sat first to talk with God on Sunday morning about "what to do."  He helped me work out the important things for our eldest to know now and what could be left for later.  He led me to Scripture (Genesis 1 and Psalm 139) that talks about how we're made: how wonderfully, how specifically, how intentionally.  And He whispered to my heart, There's no time like the present.  Brew some tea, get out some chocolates, and chat tonight.  I felt emboldened by that quiet time and at ease.

Nevertheless, because I'm pro at wimping out and not following through, I told Elizabeth that morning that  before bedtime we'd be having a special tea and chat about being a woman.

She was so excited about it!  Maybe it was the appeal of tea and chocolate, but whatever it was, my nervous mommy heart set even more at ease.

As we were getting tea ready that evening and picking out our chocolates, Elizabeth said to me, "You know what I think would be cool, mom?  Starting a mom and daughter Bible study where we read something from the Bible together and talk about it."

The Lord had used His Word to give me structure for talking with Elizabeth about growing and changing.  The Lord had also been working in Elizabeth's heart to give her a love for reading and knowing more about the Word.

Coincidence?

Nope, just another interrupted by grace moment brought to me by the Good Shepherd, my Heavenly Father.

By the way, our time together was super fun and natural and just right for where our big girl is at the moment.  Phew!  Praise the Lord.

How was your weekend?  Looking back, can you see a time or two that God interrupted you by grace?  I'd love to hear your stories, so don't hesitate to leave a comment!

{Day 8} Interrupted by My Best Laid Plans

I love Mondays.  For us the are generally unscheduled, quiet home days.

Today was different.

Two things rocked our Monday-boat.  The first was taking Katherine to the doctor during walk-in hours to have her little ears checked for infection.  (My mom, who is in town for most of the month - yay! -  told me to take her, and I knew that every time she saw Katherine with a snotty nose she'd say, "Have you taken her to the doctor yet?"  So I took her.)  She had not infection, thankfully.  Nevertheless, that jaunt up the hill to the doc's set our school start back about an hour.

The second blip on the screen was a trip I had planned  into our lessons, to the Museum of Natural History for Elizabeth to stroll through the Native American exhibit noting on a map what regions of the United States different tribes were from.  I was so excited about having come up with a not-another-novel-to-read history activity for her, so despite our late start, we were going to go for it!  Well, we learned something together on our trip to the museum.

It's not open on Monday.

The best laid plans of mice and men, as they say.

The Bible says

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.  

Proverbs 16:9

In the middle of our morning, I'd had a couple of what I'll call spaz-mom moments, just a couple more occasions of unnecessary loss of patience with the kids due to my own lack of self-control.  Yep, a little of that.  Again.  >Sigh.<

Apologies extended, I was determined to get to that Museum and redeem the day, even though our outing would extend well into Katherine's normal naptime.  But the Good Lord had a different idea for redeeming our day: getting us outside in long-awaited gorgeous weather, in an unexpected place, at an unanticipated time.  And so He interrupted me by grace.

To take advantage of the parking we'd paid for, we set to strolling around.  The museum abuts the University of Pittsburgh's campus and many people were out: having their lunches, going to class, running, or just sitting, obviously thankful to be free to be outside.  Finally!  We made our way to a few different landmarks, enjoying the freedom of no schedule, beyond getting back to the car by 1:46pm!  I learned how many states Elizabeth can identify on a blank U.S. map.  Brian ran around and around a large fountain.  Katherine attracted many admirers.  I took it all in, quite thankful that silly museum is closed on Mondays, especially given I certainly did not deserve such a gift, (being spaz-mom and all).

God is good.  Is He not?

A very kind Pitt student offered to take our photo,
but Brian bolted before he could press the button.
I love this photo!

*     *     *

How did the Lord interrupt you by His grace today?

{Day 3} Interrupted by Not Being Interrupted

It is late; we went to the Pirate game tonight!  It was freezing, but they won - yay!

Today the Good Lord interrupted me by His grace through my little boy, Brian.  For those who don't know much about me, my husband and I have three children.  Elizabeth is in third grade, Brian is in preschool, and Katherine is one.  We homeschool.

For a long time, trying to figure out what to do with Brian when I needed time to work with Elizabeth was challenging.  This year, in addition to trying to be more proactive with him, I've seen him mature dramatically in his ability to occupy himself when necessary.  Today was a magnificent display.  Most days, I work with Brian on something first thing during our school time, leaving Elizabeth to independent writing or math work.  But this morning I knew I had to work with Elizabeth on a couple of things, so I started with her rather than Brian.

> As an aside, we're all in the same room, it's just that one is getting more attention.  Katherine was napping, in case you were wondering! <

The work with Elizabeth took much longer than expected.  But in that time Brian uncomplainingly did everything I asked him to do or suggested that he do: dot-to-dots, cut and paste, coloring a little with me while Elizabeth wrote something, cleaning up the papers under his desk, folding some clean dish towels.  Then he spent a long while playing with some little Angry Birds toys.  I was flabbergasted at the whole scene and thanked God in my heart for such a blessing: not only the freedom to work with Elizabeth without ending up losing my patience with Brian, but also the relief of knowing he is growing up and out of his (very normal, but sometimes trying) more baby-ish ways.  Such a blessing to find myself interrupted by grace without being interrupted by Brian!  Ironic.

The day was going so well!

Not too much later, however, I was rude to Elizabeth and lost my patience with her about a math lesson that she was having trouble understanding, (terrible, I know).  Absolutely no reason to get frustrated and speak so loudly, but I did.  Reflecting on that and thinking about Brian and his increasing maturity gives me hope for myself, despite the long way I have left to go in the holiness department.  Makes me think of this verse:

being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.  Philippians 1:6

Does that mean there is hope that one of these days I will be a patient math teacher?  Maybe by the time Katherine is in third grade!

Any grace interruptions in your world today?