Walks for WASH

One day last week as I had laundry running, dishes drying in the sink, and a cool glass of water in my hand, I thought about how amazing it is to have access to water all. the. time.  I began to wonder, then, how to combine this thought with the Lenten season, to get our family thinking about relieving the stain on others' lives (loving our neighbor) through these six weeks before Easter.   World Vision is one organization that I know endeavors to alleviate and eliminate poverty in the world, so I got on their site and looked around for their water initiatives.  They have great things going on.  Their main water initiative is WASH (Water, Sanitation, and Hygiene).

The most surprising thing I learned was how water collection effects girls' education.  Girls and women are usually the water fetchers, and since they can spend more than half their day walking back and forth to bring water home, their opportunities to go to school are limited, if not completely impossible.  Other effects of lack of clean water access are better known, like diseases that weaken or kill and the inability to grow food.  Yet I am shocked by my complacency as I enjoy my comfortable access to a liquid that enables me to do so many things.

With all of these thoughts floating in my mind, I wanted to come up with some way to incorporate giving clean water into our family's Lenten season.  After speaking with my husband, I decided we could walk a mile a day through these six weeks to remind us of those who walk much more each day simply to have clean-er (cause let's face it, it's not clean!) water.  At this point, I'm not even sure what we will be contributing; I'm trusting God to bring that to light over these weeks of examination and reflection.  But I wanted to use this space to invite you to join us!

I'm not going to start up a Go Fund Me page or anything.  If you feel compelled to give, please do.  In fact, here is World Vision's page with donation opportunities that involve bringing water to communities.  You can give a share of a well, water to a family, a whole well, etc.  If you want to pledge to our walkathon-ish thing we've got going on, let me know.  I'd be happy to put together a larger collection to give on Easter Sunday to World Vision; the kids would love that!  Perhaps you'd like to walk a mile every day in solidarity, as well!*

I cannot even imagine how different my life would be if, like many mothers in the developing world, my children and I had to walk 3 or 4 miles every day (maybe more than once) to get the water we needed to survive!  We'll be working to learn more over Lent and I'll share off and on about those things.  No one in a world like ours should go without access to clean water.  Don't you agree?

To close, here are a few photos of the last couple of days. The weather here is bonkers!

It rained on our first day, and the little one's feet got too hot.

She took a short break.

 Snow on the second day

This is our jerrycan to keep track of our miles;
Containers of this shape are common for carrying water in Africa.

Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again.  The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

John 4:13-14 

*If you decide to give or walk with us and want to let the kids know, that would be fantastic.  They'd love to hear that others are behind them as their mom makes them walk a mile every day. (Poor kids! haha)  There's snow on the ground here today!

Fighting for Christmas

Eight-twenty this morning was a comical and accurate example of what December has felt like for me this year!  My phone dinged a notification.  I was working on this post and it was a couple of moments till I checked my phone.  My daughter had to be at church 5 minutes ago to acolyte for the first service!  Obviously it was on my calendar, but I never noticed it this week.  She was sound asleep snuggled under her blankets, recovering from a busy weekend that included a youth lock-in.  Intentionally, I was letting her sleep in.  Oops!  Well, I threw on clothes as quickly as I could, slipped into a coat and boots, grabbed my purse, and drove way-too-fast to church to sub for her!  Thank goodness I'd showered the night before - it's the little gifts!!

Even better, I really enjoyed being in the service.  Immensely.  The choir's anthem fit so well with the Sunday School lesson I had ready for the youth this morning on the transfiguration in Mark 9 - the glorious Christ, the center of Christmas Himself on beautiful display.  The sermon was about celebration and fit so well with the post you are about to read, confirming for me the need to interrupt my hiatus to write this Christmas.

I have been needing to get this all down, to get the thoughts in my head sorted out one way or another.  Hopefully these words are not only a help me, but to you too, dear reader.  I wish you a very merry Christmas, giving this to you as my gift!  Cling to Christmas with all your might!!

Earlier this month in an Advent devotional provided by our church, which includes Bible passages and selected readings from C.S. Lewis, I read:

Christianity is a fighting religion.

It thinks God made the world - that space and time, heat and cold, and all the colors and tastes, and all the animals and vegetables, are things that God "made up out of His head" as a man makes up a story.  But it also thinks that a great many things have gone wrong with the world that God made and that God insists, and insists very loudly, on our putting them right again.

Christianity is a fighting religion.  I don't know what December has been like for you, but I think that sentence really struck me because I feel like I have been fighting this month - fighting for Christmas to win over in my heart.  Not Christmas-the-feeling promoted by Deck the Halls, White Christmas, and Holly Jolly, but Christmas-the-Truth proclaimed by Joy to the Word, God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, and Hark! The Herald Angels Sing.

December has been a tug-of-war in my heart and mind between the Truth and the lies.  I have been more impatient and frustrated in the last few weeks than I have been in a while, and for no good reason that I can find other than the reality of the earthly battle every Christian faces against the world, the flesh, and the devil.  And oh!  How the latter would love to see us stop fighting:

• to give up on the Advent readings with our family, because it seems like no one is listening;
• to let go of the traditions, because they seem like too much this year;
• to give in to all the stress of preparations, because it's more natural to complain than rejoice;
• to take our eyes of that precious manger, because it seems more comforting to wring our hands and lament than to cast our cares on Him and live in the freedom Christmas heralds into the world;
• to forget about loving our neighbor generously, because we aren't sure we have the reserves to care for anyone else.

Christianity is a fighting religion.  And I'm gonna fight!  Why?  Because I know Jesus.  Because there is victory over the grave.  Because I'm in enemy territory and I want to stand firm.  For What?  Not a feeling, but for Truth.

• So my kids can taste and see that God is GOOOOOD. 
• So that in my little spheres of influence I might have the opportunity to see the Kingdom come in new ways.
• So that I can see my Savior demonstrate His strength in my weakness.
• So that God can be glorified, as He is worthy to be.

None of us are entitled to anything, not even a holly, jolly Christmas. But Christians know the Prince of Peace.  And we can let Him rule in our hearts.  As Lewis points out, we can participate in God's work of putting the world right again.

So when I lose my patience, I ask my kids and my Gracious God to forgive me.  When I feel my pulse quickening with anxiety about gifts, or plans, or not measuring up, I stop and look to my Good Shepherd to takes my hand and says I love you, always, little lamb; let's take each day one step at a time.  I will lead you.  When I want to grumble, grovel, or gripe, I will turn on the Pandora Christmas Hymns station and let the lyrics permeate my mind and soul.  When we pass a bell ringer and her red bucket, I dig in my wallet, the kids throw in coins, and we talk about God's love .  Through all of those things I am reminded how the Lord has put my soul right with Him thought Christ, and it renews my desire to be a part of His ministry of reconciliation in the world.

Christmas, true Christmas, is restored in my heart.

Every time we choose love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, or self-control, despite every fiber of our being wanting us to go in the opposite direction, we are fighting the good fight!  Every time we repent and believe the good news, heaven rejoices and hope is restored!  Every time we put our neighbor's interests before our own, the Kingdom comes and Christmas is rightly observed!

Christmas is God-come-down, true, life-changing love.  That "sweet baby Jesus in the manger" came to rescue a world lost in sin and destined for death and destruction.  When our hearts are filled with the faith to believe that Truth, well, everything is different.  Christmas holds fresh new wonder, and will year after year!

We have a choice.

Will you fight with me? 

Let's start here.  Sing along and rejoice!

Hail the heav'n-born Prince of Peace!

Hail the Son of Righteousness!

Light and life to all He brings

Ris'n with healing in His wings

Mild He lays His glory by

Born that man no more may die

Born to raise the sons of earth

Born to give them second birth

Hark! The herald angels sing

"Glory to the newborn King!"

Combating the Christmas Crazy, by Faith

When our three-year-old, Katherine, can get an adult's attention, she has all kinds of plans for them.  I observe this almost every time someone walks into our home.  She leads them up to her room to show them whatever is important to her at the moment or she guides them back to our familyroom to engage in some very involved pretend play.  As I watched her with my friend on Tuesday, I noticed that she was micromanaging everything Kristen did.  "You sit here."  "Hold this thing this way."  "No, like this."  I have kind friends who always play along for a while or till Katherine is distracted.  It is endearing.

As I observed Katherine on Tuesday, I was struck by how much I am like her in life.  I have plans and programs for my life and expectations of how others will fit into that.  "You sit here."  "You behave this way, so I can be comfortable."  "No, don't act like that; I can't deal with it."  I often spend more time trying to control my surroundings and circumstances, rather than embracing and enjoying them.

Tomorrow is Christmas.  For most of us that means spending time with family and friends.  For some, maybe many, of us, that also means dreading what might happen, engaging in tense conversations, having to interact with "that" relative, or enduring questions we have no interest in answering!  A holiday time that they say is supposed to be full of joy, peace, and harmony is anything but.  What are we to do?

I am fond of telling my children that it does not matter how their sibling is treating them, they are responsible for their own behavior.  We absolutely cannot control another person.  We can try, of course, but that rarely gets us our desired results.  Hanging out with our families at Christmas is no exception!  This truth has me thinking about what Scripture has to say about how believers should act this Christmas, and every day.  What does God want me to do?  What does His Word say about how to interact with people, whether they be kind or difficult?

A few verses came to mind:

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.

And what does the Lord require of you?

To act justly and to love mercy

and to walk humbly with your God.

Micah 6:8

How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Praise be to you, O LORD; teach me your decrees. With my lips I recount all the laws that come from your mouth. I rejoice in following your statutes as one rejoices in great riches. I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways. I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word.  Psalm 119:9-16 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

Love never fails.  I Corinthians 13:4-8 

The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love.  Galatians 5:6b

If you find yourself feeling nervous about family time tomorrow, remember the Lord is near and He has shown you how to love Him and love others.  Do not let your worry and imagination get the best of you ahead of time, creating scenarios.  Each time a fear arises, tell it, God goes with me and He will help me with what actually happens.  I do not need to make up a future I cannot predict.  Meditating on the Word can also help you to stay steady, like the Psalmist says above.  Have some verses ready to call to mind when you feel tension mounting inside you.  And as you walk through your day, call to mind how love expresses itself: kindness, patience, not envying, not boasting, looking to the interests of others, and so on and so forth.  You can never go wrong with love!  The tough part is that loving usually means dying to self and promoting another, even if they are annoying, rude, or even hateful.  Christ is in you; He will help you choose love!

What a better way to do Christmas, than to love others the way that Christ has loved us!

Remember how He loved us?  While we were still sinners.

My hope, of course, is that you're looking forward to your Christmas celebrations!  But a lot of Christmas movies indicate that these family gatherings often involve a lot of ... squirming, to say the least.  Don't worry, meditate on the Word of God, and choose God-style love.  May God bless you as you walk in His way on this most incredible of holidays, when we celebrate how the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.

Merry Christmas!

PS For my family that is reading this.  I am really looking forward to hanging out with all of you.  Don't worry!  I simply wanted to explore how we Christian folks can use God's Word to guide us in trying circumstances at Christmas.  Love you all!

2016 Word of the Year: Be on the Alert!

Resolutions have always appealed to me, because I am a planner and like goal setting.  While I rarely achieve perfection with resolutions, I have found the quote, "shoot for the moon, even if you miss, you land among the stars," to be true.  If I commit to reading a book a month or something, I may not do it every month, but I'll likely read more books that year than I did the previous.  You get the idea.

Last year, however, I felt the draw away from specifics to the more general idea or theme for 2015.  You may recall that I invited you to join me in choosing a theme word for the year.  Did any of you do that?  If so, I'd love to hear how God used that word to guide and transform you!  The word the Lord had impressed upon my heart was OPEN.  The concept, or practice, of being OPEN to the Lord kept coming up so much, I could not ignore it.  To hold myself accountable, I wrote regularly (at least till September) about how I saw God nudging me to be open.

With only a cursory review of the year, I can see how that one word, hanging above the garbage can in my kitchen, was used by the Lord to grow and stretch me in ways I never expected.  He provided opportunities for me to be OPEN, with my life, our home, my time, and my stuff, over and over again.  I'm sure those chances would have come with our without  a 2015 theme word, but it is fun to look back and testify to God's work from providing the word, OPEN, to providing opportunities to grow in Him by being OPEN.

This year was far from perfect.  Many were the times I was not generously open to God or with those around me!  But I would not count having a theme word as a waste, because I saw God work in and around me.  Without opening the year with that theme word, I would not have the same testimony to God's goodness, patience, mercy, and love.  This year He showed me there was space for playgroup, leading a Mom Heart group, and gave me two speaking engagements (which came right on top of each other and really stretched my trust in His provision, and wisdom)!  He filled me with joy as I saw dreams I had for our home coming true: space being used for both gathering people together and making and deepening relationships.  I guess God has primarily used being OPEN in 2015 to solidify the ministry calling He has on my life right now.  I am humbled, because my failures and shortcomings could not hold Him back.

And, can I tell you a secret?  Lean in.  Though sometimes it has been hard, mostly it has been a lot of fun!

That brings to mind these verses from Psalm 37:3-5,

Trust in the Lord, and do good;

dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.

Delight yourself in the Lord,

and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord;

trust in him, and he will act.

Trust in HIM, and HE will act.  He knows the desires of your heart better than you do.  He is also utterly trustworthy, (Christmas and Easter testify to that).  So again for 2016, I invite you to seek the Lord, keeping your eyes peeled and your ears open, for whether he has a theme word or verse for your walk with Him.  I've had the word surrender coming up a lot lately.  That one scares me.  A lot!  I hold on so tightly to so many things that are not Christ, but more about that later....

I wish you a very Merry Christmas, one that is full of gifts from above as you worship the King of kings and Lord of lords!  And keep your heart open for a word from the Lord.  I am confident that He who began a good work in you will carry it to completion!  Let Him amaze you.

A Fierce Flourishing: Part II, Life in the Spirit

Back on October 29, I said that "tomorrow" I would share the second half of the talk I shared with our local MOPS group.  Today is that tomorrow!  You can read Part I here, in which I lay out the Gospel.  I reread it and felt renewed excitement about how much God has done for us through Christ - a perfect topic for reflection in the Christmas season.  I encourage you to start there, then come back to read this post.

Welcome back!  Isn't it amazing how much we receive freely from the Lord when we take Him at his Word and place our trust in Christ.  Today I want to expand on point number three: "We are filled with the Holy Spirit.  God empowers us to live for Him!"

The passage du jour for the talk was Galatians 2:13-25

13 For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. 14 For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” 15 But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. 

16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. 24 And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 

25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.

In the opening verses of this section, Paul reminds us of Christian freedom; we are free from sin and have unrestricted access to God.  Then he points out the new purpose we are given when we become a Christian: serve one another humbly in love.  This echos Jesus' words in John 13:34, A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

Side note: "Loving one another" includes the people we live with!  I am convinced that we can grow more spiritually under our own roofs than anywhere else.  At home our character is truly tested.  In fact, I never knew what a horrible person I could be until I got married, then had kids!  For fun, reread verse 15.  Don't some days at home feel like "biting and devouring"days!  Please tell me you know what I mean ... now, back to the post.

Life in Christ gives us new purpose, to love one another.  And it also introduces a battle.  The theme Fierce Flourishing captures this so well.  When we believe in Jesus a serious war begins within us, the old self (flesh) vs. the Spirit, our new identity in Christ.  The list in verses 19-21 manifests itself even under our own roofs and in our actions and reactions as moms, or whatever our occupation!  (This is why Jesus died on the cross, by the way.)

But the situation is not one of hopeless struggle till we get to heaven.  No, the new Spirit in us means we can become Fiercely Flourishing Christians, and moms.  The Spirit is the difference maker, the game changer, the hope giver!  If you are a Christian the Spirit of God LIVES IN YOU.  (Let that sink in a minute.)  So Paul gives three instructions for living by the Spirit and not being defeated in the new battle that is introduced into your life when you come to faith:

1. WALK by the Spirit
2. BE LED by the Spirit
3. KEEP IN STEP WITH the Spirit

What do all these mean?  Generally speaking, they all imply activity, intentional movement away from the flesh toward God and others.  We must be learning the Spirit's way so we can walk in it: read the Bible, pray, hear the Word preached, attend Bible study.  We must be listening for the Spirit's direction to be led by Him.  And we must be quick to get back into step with the Spirit when we're out of step.  In short, a fierce flourishing does not come without engagement!  The Spirit will give us direction, strength, and wisdom to become fiercely flourishing people; engaging with Him is how we grow!

Do you long to to be the kind of person described in Galatians 5:22-23: loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled?  That is only possible as God works in us through His Spirit; we engage in the transformation process by walking, being led by, and keeping in step with Him.  The goal is not perfection, only in Christ are we made perfect.  No, friends, the goal is faithful engagement, one day at a time, with the Spirit of God who lives in us and can transform us, enabling us to flourish fiercely!

Here's a quick summary of the two parts of this talk, before I send you on your way:

• Jesus is the only way we can have a right relationship with God and live eternally with Him - our biggest problem is solved!
• A right relationship with God is the way our hearts and lives can be transformed into something new and good.
• God puts His Spirit in us to help us in the battle that will wage in us against the flesh till we get to heaven.
• We can only experience a fierce flourishing in the Christian life by engagement with the Spirit, starting right where we are, the goal being faithfulness, not perfection.

May this Christmas season be a new beginning for you!  May the Lord fill you with awe at His free gift of love to you in His Son, gratitude for the Spirit He has put in you to transform you, and hope that the fierce flourishing you're longing for can be found by engaging with Him.

Peace.

Open for 2015 {Week 36}

Every Tuesday evening around seven women start arriving in our home.  They grab a cup of tea or water from the dining room and then make themselves comfortable in the living room.  Out of their bags they pull their Bibles, notebooks, pens, and their copy of Sally Clarkson's Mission of Motherood, this fall's discussion book.

It has been several years since my first read through the book.  I remember how it changed my life as a mom.  Sally's biblical encouragement opened my eyes to mothering by following Jesus' example, looking at the way he taught, guided, admonished, and did life with his disciples.  At the time, all I knew was that I wanted to get my preschooler to obey me, but she didn't always want to!  Then I would get mad, my default when I'm not getting my way.  It was a sorry cycle.  Mission of Motherhood gave me new ideas and new hope.

Reading through the book again this fall - with a couple more children added to the mix and all older than Elizabeth was when I first read it - I am disappointed I have read it over and over throughout the last several years!  The principles of mothering by faith, not formula, are timeless.  The work has gotten both more fun - because older kids are lots of fun - but also more challenging, as there are more decisions to be made, more focused character training is necessary, and their questions are getting tougher!

Honestly, I am not up to the task.  I am well aware of my own flaws, (I still default to anger when I am not getting my way), and of my flimsy strength to keep on in the good fight of the faith.  Rereading Sally's book as my oldest is on the cusp of puberty and my youngest is busy being three has given new wind to limp my sails.  There's hope!  We're all gonna make it because God is faithful and because He can transform me, and my kids.

May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.  1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

This blog post is way behind, but being OPEN to transformation was the theme that was emerging mid-September.  Doesn't is sometimes seem like giving up or being mediocre is really the best option?  The phrase "I just can't adult today" has become a funny refrain in our lives and on our Facebook feeds.  I find it hilarious!  But I think it is indicative of how hopeless and ill-equipped we often feel to handle what is before us.  God promises over and over in His Word that He can transform us, from the inside out!  And that He will give us hope for each day.


So, to the weary mother who feels like she's failing, God says, I gave you these little ones, because you are the mother I had in mind for them.  Trust me; love them; don't fear; keep giving; I love you!  I will not abandon you and I will provide for all your needs, from forgiveness of your sins to food on the table.  I can change your life and your family's life!  Press on in faith.

When I first read Mission of Motherhood, I watched God do amazing things in our family as He gently pointed out areas in my life in need of change.  I began to enjoy my relationship with Elizabeth, rather than thinking of her as a job, a drain on my time, or a project.  I had the privilege of being her mom!

I wonder what God will do this time around,

if I OPEN up my heart to the transformation He has for me?

Time to Take Action:
I tell you these things to lift up your hearts and encourage you.  Dear one, you might feel stuck, but you are not!  The change you are looking for, however, will not come with a better plan or more self-discipline.  You need to be transformed by the Living God.  Thankfully, that's His business!  First, He cleanses us of all our sin through faith in Christ, then spends the rest of our lives molding us into His likeness by the power of His Spirit in us!  This is not just for moms, but for all people who would believe.

Will you take Him at His word and let Him transform you?

Here are some verses for reflection:

Ezekiel 36:24-28For I will take you out of the nations; I will gather you from all the countries and bring you back into your own land. I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. Then you will live in the land I gave your ancestors; you will be my people, and I will be your God.

Romans 12:1-2Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

2 Corinthians 3:16-18But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

photo credit

Open for 2015 {Week 33}

Last week was what I'll call a Pushback Week.  For several days almost everything I asked the kids to do was met with opposition.  Something was not right and I was not sure I had the stamina - or kindness in my heart - to outlast it.  I'm typing here today, so you know I did, but in the midst of it I was not confident!

Knowing that I was reaching my breaking point, (meaning I wanted to scream and yell a lot, give my children life-long consequences, and tell them they could never come out of their rooms, ever), it occurred to me that perhaps it was time to consider being OPEN.  I could not change my kids' hearts,  but what did God want to happen in me?  How could I use these trying days to take a deep breath and trust the Lord to use them to increase the fruit of His Spirit in me?

I wish I could say that, after those holy thoughts, I kept my cool every moment and gently guided each one child his or her moments of frustration, willful disobedience, and anger.  I cannot.  But I can say, Praise be to God who uses being a parent to remind me how He loves me when I am ungrateful and discontent, unlovable and disagreeable.

• Being OPEN when I am getting pushback from my children means remembering my own scarlet sin, and that my Savior has washed me white as snow.

• Being OPEN also means trusting in the Lord and loving Him so much that I press on in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, despite my strong desire to throttle the little blessings He's given me!

Like I said, it was not a stellar week for me either; I am weak and a work in progress, just like my children.  But when one is interrupted by grace in the middle of a Pushback Week, the best she can be is thankful.  Who is this God we serve who is so slow to anger and abounding in love?  Our Redeemer--the LORD Almighty is his name-- is the Holy One of Israel.

Have a good weekend with Him!
Heather

PS Most of the time, I think my kids are the coolest creatures in the world.

Here we are pretending we're on a wild magic carpet ride!

Open for 2015 {Week 30}

Wow, August has done something to my blogging mojo!  My rhythm has been interrupted and I am having trouble getting back into it.  Nevertheless, here I am with very little to say for last week, except that it was a real treat.  My husband and I got to spend three days traipsing around Pittsburgh, just the two of us!*  Pretending we were young and carefree, we walked almost everywhere, ate loads of delicious food, and played around town like tourists.  So much fun!

What really made the time special, was thinking about our history.  On Monday we celebrated thirteen years of marriage.  Each of those years has its share of delightful memories and dreadful moments.  Married folks, can I get an 'Amen' on that?  How many times have we laughed in those years?  Too many to count.  How many times have we needed to forgive or be forgiven in those years?  Way too many to count!

Marriages are built day by day on the foundation of the commitment, the vow that was spoken before witnesses.  Man, it takes a lot of work!  Life never slows down.  We can't put our feet up for too long before there's another decision to make together or another obstacle to face hand-in-hand.  There are days we want to quit, because we're human.  But there are days we're so in love and happy, because while marriage takes work, it is not always work.

The glue that really holds this operation together, however, sustaining and providing all we need so we can keep on loving one another, is "the third strand."

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
    and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
    But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

When it comes right down to it, neither Colin nor I, nor the two of us together, can take credit for these thirteen years.  God alone has kept our strands tightly woven together and we trust Him to do the same for however many more years, decisions, fun, and obstacles we have ahead of us.

What does any of this have to do with being OPEN?  I hadn't really thought about it in those terms last week, but I guess despite all that is behind us, I must be OPEN to pressing on in the commitment and to trusting the Lord to see us through whatever will come our way.  One of my friends, (Hi, Kristen!), said celebrating Anniversaries is funny because while it seems like you have arrived at something worth celebrating, you still have to keep doing the same thing "till death does you part."  An Anniversary is not an end, simply a milestone.  Anniversaries offer an opportunity to awe and wonder at what the Lord has done in sustaining a marriage through all of the mess and beauty!  What a time for thanks giving.

Time to take action:  Married folks, I don't know where you find yourself on the marriage-feelings spectrum today.   You may be in one of those blissful phases or you may be wondering if there is a way out.  No matter where you are, stop.  LOOK TO THE LORD and ask Him to OPEN your eyes to what He has done and what He is doing.  SEEK HIS FACE, asking Him to show you where you need to repent and to fill you with faith to believe He has not abandoned you and your spouse.  GIVE HIM THANKS even if it is hard.  He has not let you go; He will not let you go.

Before this day is through, do something just for your husband or wife, any large or small expression of love that God brings to mind!

*A shout out of thanks to my in-laws who took the kids for us for those days so we could pretend we were in our twenties again!

Open for 2015 {Week 29}

With the end of the musical the two older kids were in this summer, the end of July approaching, and the first stretch of sunny days, it finally felt like summer vacation started last week!  Since we finally had rehearsal-free days and almost nothing on the calendar, I decided the kids and I needed to have a vacation week.  We went to the pool almost every day, saw the Minion movie, played mini golf, enjoyed relaxed mornings at home, and spent a day at an amusement park with dad and grandparents.  Of course, in the midst of it we still had to grocery shop, wash clothes and dishes, prepare meals, and tidy the house now and then, but in the relaxed context of a "vacation week" even the chores didn't seem so daunting.   What a beautiful week it was!

I was so tickled to gaze on the blankness of the end of July and all of August calendar.  What peace for my frantic soul!  There was an opportunity for the kids to try out for the second summer play at the Playhouse, but for our sanity I made the decision not to let them try out.  My heart was a bit pained, knowing they would miss out on The Fantastic Mr. Fox, which is such a fun story.  But we have been working our way through the book Margin in Sunday School, and I knew Wisdom was telling me we needed to get back to family dinners and evenings together in August, before everything picks back up in the fall.  A margin in our time would provide that.  Of course, I was still disappointed I couldn't have my cake and eat it too: a peaceful schedule with play participation!

Mid-week, the temptation came.  I received a message from the previous show's director that there was still a need for actors for Mr. Fox.  Ooooh, such a great opportunity!  Should we just do it?  There is a need.  Maybe I was wrong about not participating.

Temptations don't have to be evil, you know.  There are many good things that can pull us away from what is best.  I knew the right thing was to decline the good thing for something better - something I needed, something the kids needed, something the family needed - a free August.  Remembering that our friends had not gotten a chance to try out, I told the director our kids were not available, but perhaps our friends were still interested.

Man, I really hate to feel like I am letting someone down.  And making decisions for your kids that are wise is not always easy; THERE ARE SO MANY COOL THINGS TO BE A PART OF!  Being open last week meant being willing to "choose the better over the good," a little phrase I heard someone share at a leadership training camp I went too way back in year 2000.

The biggest challenge is letting the Lord guide us in wisdom, so we can make decisions that honor Him.  I have gotten back into reading a chapter of Proverbs a day and I love how the opening chapters talk so much about wisdom and how good she is to those who seek her.  I will leave you with these verses from the beginning of Proverbs 2 for contemplation:

My son, if you accept my words
and store up my commands within you,
turning your ear to wisdom
and applying your heart to understanding—
indeed, if you call out for insight
and cry aloud for understanding,
and if you look for it as for silver
and search for it as for hidden treasure,
then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God.
For the Lord gives wisdom;
from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.
He holds success in store for the upright,
he is a shield to those whose walk is blameless,
for he guards the course of the just
and protects the way of his faithful ones. 

Then you will understand what is right and just
and fair—every good path.
For wisdom will enter your heart,
and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul.
Discretion will protect you,
and understanding will guard you.

Time to Take Action:  Are you in the midst of needing to make some decisions right now for yourself or your family?  Ask the Lord for wisdom to see the better rise to the top over the good things.  Ask Him for the strength to say confident yeses and nos where needed.  And then trust Him, by making the decisions to which He guides you.  May He bless you as you seek Him!

Open for 2015 {Week 28}

On Saturday, our family had plans to visit the four covered bridges in our county.   The kids and I had taken a driving tour to see them shortly after we moved here two years ago, but my husband had never been.  The drive affords one a chance to take in some of Western PA's beautiful countryside and each bridge offers a brief history lesson, making one wonder how many carriages passed over them, what their riders and drivers talked and worried about, and if the past was as quaint as we would like to believe.  Well, I don't know if my children were thinking about those things, but I was.

Earlier in the week, I was so thrilled we had a free Saturday morning and plans to go on a family adventure.  When I woke up Saturday morning, however, the but-you-could-get-so-much-done vice began to tighten its grip on my thoughts.  Delight disappeared and all I could see were the myriad things  I "really should" do with that empty morning.

But the morning wasn't empty, we had plans!  The hours were already accounted for and I was going to get to be with my family.  People, I had to talk myself back into the plans I was so excited about just a couple of days before!  Aren't our emotions and minds strange like that?  I mean, really. I am embarrassed to admit that I was going to let unnecessary concern about tasks - that could be done at any time - keep me from some good, quality, summery family time.

Not long ago I read a quote that said something like, We need to learn to live with the undone.  The gist was that there will constantly be things left undone or things needing done that we cannot get to at a moment.  I struggle with this a great deal.  I choose, wisely, to spend my time in the morning one way, then spend my afternoon regretting that I didn't spend it in a "more productive" way, even if I had a fantastic time doing the other thing.  I am a silly girl and need to learn to value rest as much as I do productivity, or the illusion thereof.

Anyway, back to Saturday.  I talked myself out of even suggesting to my husband that we postpone.  Into the car we climbed with a small bag of snacks, five water bottles, the camera and tripod, and directions.  The day was glorious, the company was my own personal fantastic four, and we had a wonderful morning together, ending in the early afternoon with a visit to a farm market that was new to all of us and a Wendy's lunch.

How foolish it would have been to stay home and do chores!

I guess Saturday's lesson was practicing being OPEN to what is before me, not changing plans for fear of what I might miss out on or might make me feel more accomplished.  I know it doesn't always work out this way, but funnily enough Saturday morning was so relaxing and fun that when we got home I had energy for tidying up, vacuuming, and dusting!  I would not have believed you if you had told me in the morning that the day would turn out that way.  Not. at. all.  The Good Lord is trying to help me deal with my idols and I'm so thankful He got through to stubborn me this past weekend allowing for time with family and time to restore order.  Grace upon grace!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart

and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways submit to him,

and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Time to Take Action:  Do you have a hard time resting?  Does it make you feel guilty?  Do you feel like you're "supposed to" use every blessed second to get something done?  The irony of this style of life is that not resting usually leads to less productivity!  The Lord instructs His people to rest from physical labor and to spiritually rest in Him.  We can express our trust in Him and our love for Him by being the finite ones we are and obeying His instruction.  After all, it is most wise to let the One who is God be God.

Home: Not Just a Training Ground for Your Children

Every time I am stretched out on the couch reading an inspiring book on motherhood, family, or home making, I underline many sentences, imagine how bright the light of Christ could shine in and from our home, and I get excited!

Then I put the book down.

Within minutes someone needs me and I don't want to be needed, again.  Someone starts whining about a terrible injustice, like she's sitting in my space on the couch, and I don't want to train gently, again.  Or I suddenly remember a to-do that has to be done to-day, and I sigh and groan, again.

Often the connection between ideals and reality is fishing-line thin and about-to-snap taut.  My desires for order, peace, joy, and life in our home are often thwarted by the very people I am trying. so. hard. to. serve. with. love. She says, through clinched teeth!

Two weekends ago, while I was sitting at the Broadmoor taking in this view

and processing what the Lord was teaching me at the Mom Heart Intensive, He had something to say to me.

Your home is not only a training ground for your children,

it's your training camp, too!

What does that mean?  Let me flesh it out for us.

As I shared in this post, the toughest thing about being a mom is me, how selfish I am.  But God sees fit in His plan to place people in families where a grown-up sinner is in charge of training up small sinners!  The mistake I make is thinking that I have to have it all together to train up these little hooligans ones, burdening myself with guilt every time I fail to "get it right" and burdening them with guilt for the same.  We're all - the kids, my husband, and me - in training for righteousness and none of us will ever "arrive."  So rather than guilt, we need showers of grace.

The beauty of Christ and His cross will be magnified in our homes, as we come alongside our children to train them, while daily acknowledging before them our need for a Savior, too.  And also daily reminding them of the sufficiency of our Savior to forgive all our sin and lead us in the way everlasting!

Our weekend in Colorado included many wise words about our call as wives and mothers.  But primarily, Sally reminded of our first and foremost call to be Christ's disciples because He has made us members of a new Kingdom!  A disciple listens to her Teacher and responds, watches His ways and imitates, knows the Master's voice and follows.  Then she can invite others along like, say, her children, to learn from and love the Lord.

The point of reading books that encourage us to pursue righteousness in our homes and to instruct and train our children is not to arrive, but to be transformed and be instruments of transformation.  We are learning right along with our kids how to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, and to love our neighbor as ourselves.  So be inspired by those books!  Try new things that will orient all of your hearts toward Christ!  Give thanks for the ways rearing your kids is stretching and growing you to look more like Him!  And worship the Lord with gladness that the Gospel has the power to make all things new!

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

Galatians 6:9

*****This summer, Sally is working her way through their book, The 24 Family Ways in a weekly series on her blog, click here.  I bought it years ago, but we completed the devotionals for the first time this school year and it was very helpful.  If you are looking for practical, Biblical guidance for training your children, jump in on reading these posts this summer.  As an aside: I would recommend going through the book for children first grade and up. *****

The Most Difficult Thing About Being a Mom

Guys!  Or should I say, ladies!  I have a revelation to share with you.  I have discerned what the hardest thing about being a mom is!

Of course, there are a lot of challenging aspects of being a mom: training up the children, dealing with their misbehavior, keeping the home running, functioning on less sleep, etc.  But none of those things really tops the list.  Those are all dwarfed by the greatest challenge facing mothers today, and mothers of every part of history past and future.

Are you ready for it?

The most difficult thing about being a mom is ME.  Yep.  Or in your case, the most difficult thing about being a mom is YOU.

What do I mean?  Well, as I march along in the mom years, having celebrated my oldest's eleventh birthday last month, I'm learning that the job never gets easier.  (You can laugh, I really did believe that at some point being a mom wouldn't be so hard once the kids were self-sufficient.)  There is no longer an infant in our home with the physical demands that brings for one's body, so I am "free" from that phase.  But guess what.  Where the little ones drain you physically, the older ones stretch you emotionally, relationally, and spiritually.  The job just keeps coming at ya, with side shows of laundry, cooking, and cleaning!

What exactly makes me the problem, then?

I am selfish.  Really selfish!

At least once an hour each day I mutter exasperatedly, I don't have time for this, or, I don't want to deal with this right now!  Why don't I?  Because I want peace in my home for my own comfort, not for the sake of my children, the sake of the Kingdom, or to bring God glory.  I love the fun times with my family when all is well, but I pitch a fit so quickly when I have to deal with an interruption, another sibling fight, spilled milk, or an urgent task I forgot about but remember when I'm about to sit down and rest.

I moan and groan.  I complain and whine.  Sometimes Often out loud!

But it is not the job; it is not the task; it is not the children.  It is ME!

The attitude of my heart needs to be changed.

How about you?  Do you feel this each day, the battle that is raging between your self-love and the call to love God and others?  Friends, we will never be free from the war this side of heaven, but we can make advances to push back the enemy, until we can enjoy the true rest of heaven!

Coming to this embarrassing realization has been helpful, because God has used it  to remind me of a few things:

1. We are not helpless before our selfishness.  The Spirit lives in us and will help us remember Jesus's teaching and example.  In each moment we have a choice; He will help us to choose light rather than darkness!
2. We are 100% forgiven.  Jesus came into the word to save sinners.  That is each of us!  He knows what we are capable of, but called us into His Kingdom to be His own and to be changed.  Our failures don't define us, and neither do our successes.  Our identity is children of God, heirs in His Kingdom.  We know ourselves, and should always be floored by that good news!  Praise the Lord!
3. We can be transformed.  "God as the great transformer" is a phrase and theme that has been coming up over and over in my life since last fall.  We all want to "be better people," but God has something far greater in mind.  He wants to work in our lives with supernatural power to transform us, to make us new, and use us to advance His Kingdom and purposes in the world.  Rejoice, there is hope for selfish mothers everywhere!  God can change our hearts and attitudes and, in turn, our homes!!

While I hate to admit that I am the problem and that I have to let go of blaming other people and circumstances for my bad attitudes, I believe that is the very beginning of being set free and the first step toward change.

Mamas, you are loved and God sees you working day in and day out to care for the physical and emotional needs of your family.  He is cheering you on, He is sustaining you, and He is there to help you in every moment!

It is always good to look to Christ, so I will close with that.  Last night in our Own Your Life* book and Bible study group, we read Philippians 2.  I was struck by looking at Jesus:

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,
    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
rather, he made himself nothing
    by taking the very nature of a servant,
    being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
    he humbled himself
    by becoming obedient to death—
        even death on a cross!

God gives us authority in our homes and over our children.  Let's push back the dark by using our position not to our own advantage, but to serve, like our Lord.

May God bless your day.

~Heather

*Pick up this book asap!  It has been such a help and encouragement to all of us.  Own Your Life by Sally Clarkson

Open for 2015 {Week 19}

Dear reader, how are you today?  Coming off of a holiday weekend can leave one feeling a bit disappointed and a little tired.  Today we return to routine tasks and maybe even have to clean up extra from a weekend of fun.  We will be doing laundry, picking up floors, clearing counters, and getting a few groceries.  How do you react when fun is over and life gets back to normal?

Our attitudes in these situations reveals a lot about our hearts.  My childishness and laziness want to rule, tempting me to leave the laundry and unpacking for tomorrow.  The bit of wisdom in my heart reminds me that if I get it going, the momentum will pick up and the work will get done sooner rather than later.  Then I'll be able to sit for a little break with the work complete; and it will be a restful break, not a distracted, restless, I-should-be-working-but-I-don't-want-to pause.

The heart has come up for me a lot this week, making it the perfect topic for today's OPEN post.  I want to be OPEN to hearing what God is trying to tell me and (even better) OPEN to responding and doing as I hear the Word.  The Bible has a bit to say about how important it is for us to respond to the Word and not be mere hearers!

It all came to a head Sunday with a reading in Luke 6 about loving one's enemies.  We all love our friends. There's no challenge in that.  But Jesus teaches His disciples to love their enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back.  This is the way of the people of the Kingdom of God.  In the devotional I'm working through by John Killinger, he calls such people, people of the loving spirit.

O Lord, I want to be a person of the loving spirit.  But, boy, it feels like I have a long way to go!

Later in the morning, the preacher at my in-law's church was preaching about the time when God dethroned Saul because He did not do as God commanded with whole-hearted devotion and exact obedience, in I Samuel 15.  As the preacher moved into application he said: A divided heart is the worst type of heart condition.

O Lord, I do not want to be a person of a divided heart.  But, boy, it feels like I am so often!

He went on to offer some ways to "check our vital signs," to see how our heart is doing:

1. How is my obedience?  Am I almost obeying or am I obeying all the way?
2. Do I trust God?  Is trust my natural instinct or do I question and try to do things my own way?
3. Is my faith genuine?

Saul did not obey as God commanded because He did not trust God's wisdom and had not placed His faith fully in the true King.  It cost him dearly.

Friends, if we settle for "almost" it costs us dearly, too!  We miss out on the joy and wonder that can be ours when we go "all in" with God.  We miss seeing what GOD can do in situations when we love our enemies, when we live as people of the loving Spirit.  We are left hopeless in our anxiety and turmoil.  But going with God sets us free!  We don't know what will happen on the other side of obedience, trust, and faith, but we know God - who is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow - is there working all things out for the good of those who love Him and have been called according to His purpose.

I want to be OPEN to living as God calls me to live, in faith, trust, and obedience.  I want Him to do surgery on my useless divided heart to make it whole and healthy.  He can!  He can for me and He can for you, too.

Time to take action:

Read the story of Saul in I Samuel 15:1-23.  Then take some time to pray through the "vital signs" questions, asking the Lord to help you see ways your heart is divided and renewing your commitment to Him alone.  Be OPEN to what He has to say to you and to believing that He can forgive and transform you, day by day.

May God grow us to be people of the loving spirit who reflect His love in a world that is longing for redemption, in Jesus' name.  Amen.